Getting Past Yes

Often, parties in conflict agree on wanting to mediate, but struggle over where and how to begin:  what to propose or counter-propose, and on what they should base their first move.

One difficulty, certainly, is putting aside the sense that a concession or sign of weakness is being communicated.  It helps to be reminded that in mediation there are no decision-makers involved other than the parties, themselves.  No legal determination will be rendered, and the parties’ obligation of confidentiality means only they will know what went into crafting their arrangement, and why they decided it was the better alternative.

As for where to begin, I believe the process of achieving agreement – and inherent desires of closure and finality – is eased by looking forward, not back.  I recommend parties approach with an eye toward where they’d like to go from “here” or what kind of arrangement may benefit their life or business “now,” rather than seeking an outcome that primarily redresses the past.  Proposals of the former kind are practical in nature, and allow for creativity.  They also avoid nonnegotiable discussions over matters such as principle and personally drawn conclusions over past events.

These notions can not only help set a productive exchange in motion, but can also assist parties throughout the process of achieving resolution.

About Maria Hanna Joseph

Maria Hanna Joseph, principal of Joseph Mediation, is an Attorney-Mediator who is highly regarded for her experience and ability to resolve employment, workplace and organizational disputes. She has served more than 2,000 matters over her 20 years as a mediator and her 29 year employment law career. With care, expedience and economy, Maria helps attorneys and parties achieve settlement in nearly every mediation. Moreover, her pragmatism and perseverance bring about purposeful settlements; products of Maria's insight and creativity, gained by her depth of experience and training. These qualities, along with her demeanor and the trust she engenders, have earned Maria a reputation for being able to manage extremely challenging circumstances and settle a wide variety of cases. Maria is available to provide services in-person or virtually (utilizing teleconference and desk-top videoconference resources) throughout Massachusetts, New England and the U.S.
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